I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize