Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Randomize
