Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize
