absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
