Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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