you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
