My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Randomize