at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
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