4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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