Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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