all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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