great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
