it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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