Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
