READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
