i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I deserve this hangover.
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