Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Best friends brother. Beat that.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
