I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
