I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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