i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
