I wannas sexs uuuuu
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
