it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I smell like Dick and happiness
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
