just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
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