im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
this boner is exhausting
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Randomize