i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
