Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
