We're like a lot better than the average bears
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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