I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
