Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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