just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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