Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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