You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
