he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
