I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
