I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
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