Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
