Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Randomize
