I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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