so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
