I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
