Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
