'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
