Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I have aggressive nipples.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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