So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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