Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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