yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I have already put on my inside pants.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I came so hard my ears popped.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
