I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize