yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
