my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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