Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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