There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
